How I Rewrite Content

By Derbhile Graham

Here’s an example of content I have rewritten to make it more concise and more interesting to read. It comes from a blog called How DO I Open My Jar/Tin of Caviar, from Caviar Star.

All the perishable caviar products sold by Caviar Star come in vacuum sealed containers. Whether it’s our screw-top vacuum jars or pop-down vacuum tins, our containers are sealed tight to ensure that the caviar remains fresh and uncontaminated for the duration of its trip to the customer.

Although using air-tight containers to minimize air exposure and other contaminants is important, these jars and tins can really cause a headache, or hand-ache, when trying to get them open.

Best methods for opening vacuum jars and tins: Rather than using your hands, reach into your pocket and pull out a coin, or track down a tool like a butter knife or church-key bottle opener. Applying a little pressure between the lip of the lid and the threading of the base will break the seal and pop open your caviar jar or caviar tin quite easily.

And here’s what I’d do.

At Caviar Star, we pride ourselves on keeping your caviar fresh no matter how far it travels. We vacuum seal all our caviar jars and tins to prevent the from being exposed to the air. There’s just one problem with these vacuum seals – you may find it hard to open your jar or tin of caviar.

So, what’s the best way to get your delicious caviar open?

Just reach into your pocket and pull out a coin. If you don’t have a coin, try a butter knife or church key bottle opener. Slip your coin between the lip of the lid and the jar or tin itself. The pressure of the coin will break the seal and you can open and enjoy your caviar right away.

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